Desire vs. Fear
Human emotions are a funny thing. They rarely follow logic and they are vastly twisted with feelings and our interpretations of them. It is no wonder that most people have no clue how to regulate their emotional states. And many have no idea how to approach understanding and embracing them. The desire vs fear challenge and dilemma will be explained in detail below.
There can also be a very fine line separating one emotional state from another. This can cause a huge misunderstanding for the people dealing with these differing emotional states and their corresponding “frequencies”. (more on this later).
Where does Emotional Intelligence fit in?
Emotional intelligence is a highly necessary component to healthy personal development and growth. However, it is mostly overlooked or omitted in our modern day education system. It’s like the people in charge of the human curriculum on this planet said, “I know, let’s leave out the most important parts”. It’s an essential topic to understanding Desire vs Fear.
Luckily every day is an opportunity to learn and grow. That’s why people like me who have spent a lifetime learning how to work with, calibrate and deal with emotions are stepping up to bring light, tools, and resources to this important topic.
What is Desire?
Many sources define desire as wishing or wanting, even longing for something or someone. I do not disagree that this is one valid definition and perspective. However, I see desire as a more base frequency. It’s a primal urge or nudging to expand and want more, or even to express a deep wish, want or hope.
What is Fear?
Here is what Wikipedia says about fear:
“Fear is an intensely unpleasant emotion in response to perceiving or recognizing a danger or threat. Fear causes physiological changes that may produce behavioral reactions such as mounting an aggressive response or feeling the threat”.
Again, a completely relevant and true definition. However, I would like to add to this definition by saying that Fear is also a very primal “base” emotion and frequency as well as Desire. Fear is something of a stop mechanism, that prevents movement or action due to a perceived threat or danger.
The truth here is that anything that feels uncomfortable or unfamiliar to the body and nervous system can activate a fear response. Fear is really just here to keep us safe, however it also prevents us from fully embracing new horizons if not regulated and identified properly.
How to tell the difference – Desire vs Fear
Not only are both desire and fear primal, base energies and emotions, they are also right next to each other on the Hawkin’s Scale of Consciousness. On that scale Fear calibrates at 100 and Desire is right above it calibrating at 125.
See sample scale below:
I remember the first time I saw this scale. I was literally blown away! It finally made sense to me how and why it had been so difficult for me to understand how to approach my emotional states for most of my life. I’m sure that I’m not alone in that.
So, as you can see, there’s not much difference between being in a fear response verses a desire state! This was actually great news to me when this landed because there have been so many times that I was feeling like I was in fear. Nearly all the time when something new or unfamiliar was coming into my life or thoughts and I was feeling really heavy and even disappointed about this. I thought I was stuck in a never ending fear loop all the time.
But many times, I was just feeling the exhilaration in my nervous system of desire!
Feel it to heal it
So here is my advice to you on how to really master using the Desire vs Fear dynamic to your advantage. Practice feeling fear and desire together. You will notice with a little engagement that there is a difference in where in your body you feel the desire or fear and how it feels.
Fear is usually in the head. It feels like fog, confusion, paralysis or density and you usually will not like it and want it to go away. Note, Fear can show up anywhere but the head is common and also in the stomach/gut/solar plexus area. This area feels like danger, threat, dread or uneasiness usually.
Light a spark
Desire lights a fire in the gut/solar plexus area and can also cause a powerful response in the heart chakra area and even create full body tingles. There is an intensity with desire that feels different from the fear response. Fear can feel like a hold back or a stall or stop energy.
Inside of desire is incredible creative potential for manifesting and creating entirely new realities! I cannot stress enough how important it is to learn to identify fear and learn the mechanics of transmuting it into desire and beyond to higher aspects.
Learn to allow Fear to become Desire
Becoming friends with fear and learning how to detect fear and desire frequencies in the body can take time and I highly recommend that you work with a coach or practitioner that is versed in energy and somatic work. (If you would like to book a consultation with me to find out how my Somatic Theta Healing programs and immersions can help you with this, please request a discovery call here). Please note due to the intimate nature of this work, I do not offer single, stand alone sessions.
Closing thoughts to ponder and journal prompts
What would your life, relationships and/or business look like in the absence of fear?
What if fear no longer created resistance for you?
How would you feel if you know that you had nothing to fear around fear?
What would life be like for you if you were clear and present with your deepest desires?
What if you could easily shift fear to desire on demand?
Watch the video on Desire vs Fear
Check out my YouTube video here for a more in depth explanation on the topics discussed in this article. Don’t forget to like and subscribe while you are there!
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